tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-92044974659221751882024-03-05T02:40:06.001-08:00crap that dave saysJessicahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09625781399543927102noreply@blogger.comBlogger202125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9204497465922175188.post-35057251478735790682019-05-05T19:55:00.002-07:002019-05-05T19:55:26.361-07:00<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiZ7XWGhPDBxwIKeijEFeH3wjDF7U-USUxSGUD-oxgHpEUm_jgnMysvaiDs2YtC5KD32-MI2bfzUyHTfANaHePxWRw3owZNzLryRRERGXsufBULzV2Rv1ZTzOUvNuVdV97kkIypzGf_Xzk/s1600/HSTB_1400.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1400" data-original-width="1400" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiZ7XWGhPDBxwIKeijEFeH3wjDF7U-USUxSGUD-oxgHpEUm_jgnMysvaiDs2YtC5KD32-MI2bfzUyHTfANaHePxWRw3owZNzLryRRERGXsufBULzV2Rv1ZTzOUvNuVdV97kkIypzGf_Xzk/s320/HSTB_1400.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />Jessicahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09625781399543927102noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9204497465922175188.post-35945854235121576682016-10-03T19:58:00.000-07:002016-10-03T19:58:05.415-07:00Max: I can't see!<br />
<br />
Dave: Get used to it buddy. Moms have been blocking TV screens for thousands of years.Jessicahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09625781399543927102noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9204497465922175188.post-32829570120829366352016-10-03T19:57:00.002-07:002016-10-03T19:57:16.232-07:00Max: This game is weird<br />
<br />
Dave: You're a pizza delivery guy in space! What's weird about that?!Jessicahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09625781399543927102noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9204497465922175188.post-32925464789344701212016-10-03T19:56:00.002-07:002016-10-03T19:56:29.723-07:00"You know when you wake up and you think God healed your eyes but then realize you just left your contacts in overnight? Been there."Jessicahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09625781399543927102noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9204497465922175188.post-52938078422433515192016-10-03T19:55:00.002-07:002016-10-03T19:55:44.451-07:00Jessica: Can I have a bite of your taco?<br />
<br />
Dave: I'll let you smell it. On my breath. After I eat it.<br />
<br />Jessicahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09625781399543927102noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9204497465922175188.post-5927428154395714232016-10-03T19:54:00.001-07:002016-10-03T19:54:49.150-07:00Dave to Jessica: "You know when the zookeeper goes to clean the lion cage and brings a steak to distract the lion? I brought those chips as your steak."Jessicahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09625781399543927102noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9204497465922175188.post-84609615855308799312016-10-03T19:53:00.002-07:002016-10-03T19:53:49.128-07:00"Olive loves Cheetos more than most people love life."Jessicahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09625781399543927102noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9204497465922175188.post-11908801544265458282016-01-24T20:11:00.002-08:002016-01-24T20:11:12.476-08:00Jessica: Eleanor is a very determined little girl.<br />
<br />
Dave: Where is my personality in our kids?? My genes were killed in the womb by your determined ones!Jessicahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09625781399543927102noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9204497465922175188.post-3390648526273033532016-01-24T20:10:00.000-08:002016-01-24T20:10:00.609-08:00"My stiff undershirts are tearing up my armpits. And nobody cares!!!"Jessicahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09625781399543927102noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9204497465922175188.post-3797525335939471502016-01-24T20:09:00.002-08:002016-01-24T20:09:24.246-08:00"Our microwave is the worst. My hot breath works better than our microwave."Jessicahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09625781399543927102noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9204497465922175188.post-90092094784032636722016-01-24T20:08:00.003-08:002016-01-24T20:08:43.844-08:00"The bags under my eyes are so big they could carry groceries!"Jessicahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09625781399543927102noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9204497465922175188.post-66566134060863365842015-11-06T08:49:00.002-08:002015-11-06T08:49:16.403-08:00At 6 am:<br />
<br />
I just set Max up with a donut and a movie. Because I'm a good parent.Jessicahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09625781399543927102noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9204497465922175188.post-26801626190328199582015-11-06T08:48:00.002-08:002015-11-06T08:48:39.553-08:00Dave: Did you know you got whole wheat gold fish?<br />
<br />
Jessica: Yes<br />
<br />
Dave: Oh. I didn't think anyone did that on purpose. I thought they put them on the shelves to trick people.Jessicahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09625781399543927102noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9204497465922175188.post-10036484735908113642015-11-06T08:47:00.005-08:002015-11-06T08:47:44.992-08:00To Max:<br />
<br />
Never answer the door in your underwearJessicahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09625781399543927102noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9204497465922175188.post-19973436977934188672015-11-06T08:47:00.002-08:002015-11-06T08:47:20.931-08:00To Max:<br />
<br />
How did your whole body get sticky??Jessicahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09625781399543927102noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9204497465922175188.post-5084095267692095042015-11-06T08:46:00.004-08:002015-11-06T08:46:56.103-08:00"Is there anything in the world that tastes better than Pop Tarts?!?"Jessicahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09625781399543927102noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9204497465922175188.post-4440394239360464922015-11-06T08:46:00.002-08:002015-11-06T08:46:21.410-08:00"Tom Hanks makes me so happy."Jessicahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09625781399543927102noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9204497465922175188.post-8107964634153695512015-03-20T19:46:00.003-07:002015-03-20T19:46:57.515-07:00Jessica: Ewwww. You are stinky.<br />
<br />
Dave: I burped. But it should be minty fresh, I just ate a thin mint.Jessicahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09625781399543927102noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9204497465922175188.post-7518996885455478352015-03-20T19:46:00.000-07:002015-03-20T19:46:05.239-07:00Jessica: I need to consume far less bread and sugar.<br />
<br />
Dave: Did you realize that at the bottom of the Ben and Jerry's container tonight?<br />
<br />
Jessica: Yep<br />
<br />
Dave: That's how some people find God.Jessicahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09625781399543927102noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9204497465922175188.post-64230211409227036262015-03-20T19:42:00.003-07:002015-03-20T19:42:57.820-07:00To the dog<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
"Olive, you need to figure out your life! And sorry I poked you in the eye, that was a total accident."</div>
Jessicahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09625781399543927102noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9204497465922175188.post-74713346018684331032015-03-20T19:42:00.000-07:002015-03-20T19:42:06.597-07:00While looking for music<br />
<br />
"What's a good song to play while you're wiping your kid's butt? Tough decisions to make here."Jessicahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09625781399543927102noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9204497465922175188.post-83729382273587965642015-03-20T19:40:00.002-07:002015-03-20T19:40:35.335-07:00"I would dance on hot coals if it meant a good poop afterwards."Jessicahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09625781399543927102noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9204497465922175188.post-2499101844531938692015-03-20T19:39:00.005-07:002015-03-20T19:39:56.183-07:00" Iron Man is no match for a crabby mommy."Jessicahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09625781399543927102noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9204497465922175188.post-25932489301088400282015-03-20T19:39:00.002-07:002015-03-20T19:39:24.015-07:00Dave: I like those old Victorian houses<br />
<br />
Jessica: To live in? Tiny rooms......<br />
<br />
Dave: Lots of ghosts.....Jessicahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09625781399543927102noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9204497465922175188.post-36435689942377002132014-11-03T20:10:00.002-08:002014-11-03T20:10:49.417-08:00"John Leguizamo is my vibe."Jessicahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09625781399543927102noreply@blogger.com0