"I wish Kelsey Grammer would narrate my life."

As we were watching someone get pulled over:

"Ask not for whom the lights blink. The lights blink for thee."

"Our founding fathers were babies!"

"Oh, scone.....you are just a less tasty muffin."

"Why are your arms out like that? Are your muscles too big and you can't put your arms down? .......been there."

Talking to Max:

"We are not supposed to shout 'butts' at the dinner table. We can shout 'butts' later."